Long time posting....

I thought I should post something....LOL

As Sophia would say on the Golden Girls...

Picture it, Portland, ME. February 2010.

The winter that was suppose to be but hardly was.

No shoveling, hardly no snow in a month, and fairly warm days for the far North East.

Beautiful sunshine, a few clouds, and the feeling of spring everywhere, just below the surface.

Meditation, thoughts, and energy has been centered on, trying to be in a place of love, earthiness, understanding, and acceptance, while dealing with what it is life has given.

OK Im no Sophia, and that certainly did not come out like I wanted, but oh well....

This past week has been stressful, the "Spoon Mobile", AKA the "VAN" has been in the garage since monday, after finding out that the noise I have been complaining about for months, that no one else could hear was a broken axel on one side. So the other side was doing all the work, and they think thats why it was getting 7 MPG... At least I am not nuts I guess, still its there and I've been using Kevin's car, painfully.

We had a great relaxing night at a resort in Ogunquit, Tuesday night, thanks to two friends of ours. The food was great, and the hot tub even better. I felt much better after, my BP went down a little and I slept better than a long time.

Well there is the update.

Hope everyone is well, and Im sending out Peace, Love, Hugs and more....

Veterans day ?!?!?!?

A quick post, on Veterans day.

I am a veteran, although I served 12 years, (leaving because of Clintons don't as don't tell signing, did not re-up after my commander suggested it might not be safe) As I was saying, although I served, I certainly do not feel like anyone really cares. For one, I am gay, and of course I have no rights, then I served during peace time, except for the desert storm time, but being gay cancels that out, but why?

Why is there still allowed to be discrimination. I can not march here in the parade, or so I was told, because I am gay, although I served, I would where my uniform, not a gay flag, and who cares if I am gay, there are so many gay people serving, have served etc.

Anyway, Thanks to EVERY LAST VETERAN regardless what color, what religion, who you love, etc Thank you!!!!

A Maine Gay Veteran

Maine, the way life Could have been.... Less Than?

I can not for the life in me, understand how it is justified to not allow people the rights that are given in the US Constitution, and Maine's Constitution.

I also can not understand, how religious organizations that get involved, never mind allow hatred to be manifested and multiplied, retain their tax status. Then again, if the Constitution is not upheld with rights, I guess it would not be held up for the separation of church and state. In every instance where this has failed, it has been supported, and pumped full of money by so called "Christian's", religion, churches, and in the name of the same God that was supposed to say things like, "Judge lest you be judged", "love thy neighbor as yourself", etc.

These rights are at the government level, not religion. They even put in the thing to exclude any religious organization or person did not have to preform, support etc.

I guess my hurt, sadness, pain, and feeling of less than, comes from the fact that this was even allowed. There are protections from what happened here and in California, yet, as my Grandmother used to say, "Any law or right is only as good as its upheld". Its time for the Supreme Courts to step in, and put these things in place, with NO restrictions, per the constitution. Then if a church supports/gets involved in State activities, they relinquish their tax exempt basis. Pay taxes, on EVERYTHING.

Its hard to feel happy, when this State is where I was born, raised, served my country from for 12 years, (until Clinton signed his crap). This is the blood in my veins, air I breath, and the substance that feeds me. And I remain a person that is Less Than......

Defining Self

Defining Self

What is it that defines one "Self"?

I see many people walk around, seem happy, do well in life, and life comes and goes. There are others that struggle, can not seem to find lasting happiness, struggle with a place to live, health, friends, or lack of REAL friends. The first group have space to be who they seem to want or need to be, the second do not. Its almost always the same. When someone is held back in some way, it seems to wave into the rest of their life. How many times can someone dream a dream, and honestly feel that it will never come. Im not talking redirection of thought, Im talking about in the situation they are in now, there is no possible way they can see any dream, big or small coming true.

Its even more difficult when your neighbor, store owner, land lord, whom ever, has way more than they could ever really need, yet they want more from anyone around them. The feeling of the reason people have so much, and protect it so, is that they have gotten where they are dishonestly.

Oh yes, its does cross the field or thinking, that the only way it seems to live the American dream is either you find a way to cheat, steal, and hide behind running a business, owning property, etc, or you hide yourself, live so frugally that you squeak, and safe every penny. the last group does not spent it, the first are the ones who have two houses, 4 cars, a boat or two, go on vacations, etc.

So is this what America has come too? You are either a honest, caring, loving , person, and try your hardest to be all that in everything you do, and end up barley living? Or you are the one that cheats, steals, charges 100% or more of cost of an item, so you can have more than you ever would need?

I think YES, this is what it has become. Individuals, companies, government, all are the takers. Unfortunately most of these are also Republican, and so called Christians. Is it any wonder the one sector of people, could never feel like they would see a dream, and therefore, not have dreams again. Fighting for basic needs, rights, shelter, food to eat, and trying to achieve what others have, but have it honestly.

As a disclaimer I will say there are degrees of both people. Everything people do is a learned thought process, that has formed over our grandparents, parents, people in our life's conscience and unconscience lessons we have seen. Different levels of each, and both groups waiver from trying it both ways, but in the end, you either have, or have not. Is it not time to rethink the actions we all make?

With all those thoughts said, is it any wonder people, remove themselves, hide or shy away, trying to protect what's left of themselves, their thoughts, dreams. Sometimes one action can be the end all, the auto response of our bodies and minds to enter depression, or other ailments. Sometimes that one action turns into many actions created by reaction from others actions. When will it all end?

So defining one's self would or could be set around those thoughts, and actions of others. Rather they are excepted, shunned, supported, or ridiculed.

I walk around with a heavy heart, and mind. I tend to have a extreme need for all things being of complete fairness, with compromise as I age. Dreams to me are now something that will remain a dream. My intention of being a giving person, creating, fabricating, things needed by others, while being comfortable, not taking too much, but sharing. Possibly living in a communal type setting, creating our own family, teaching, living. Thoughts of a place setup to allow like minded travelers to come, set up, or use our facilities, enjoy what they can learn and share, the area, peace. A farm, camp ground, Inn, culdasac, street, building. This and Traveling, are the dreams, the things most likely to be done if the lottery were won, or some one left me a bunch of money. Is it possible? Sure... Is it probable with my life as it is now? NO... No I do not think it is. Not at all.

So I follow the statement below.

Meditate, breath, keep "Your house" in order , stand for peace, what's right, what's good for everyone, not just for ourselves. Find peace, do the possible, and let be.......

Sun, warmth, music and breath...

Waking to a crisp morning

the hint of sunshine

unhindered breath

music leads to sunshine

A morning of sunshine seems to have been placed here today, for the enjoyment of us all.

This time of year is about the ending of things, Forest, bushes, trees change color and shine the last bright energy to last us though the cold of the next few months. Gardens are harvested and stored, the ground sleeps with the trees.

Everything we know is coming to its cycles completion to reset itself and then begin again in the spring. Knowing this should make it easier to go though the winter, the cold, and the beauty it brings.

This is a great time to think of things that we need to move past, things that weight us down, and move ourselves on along the path.

Enjoy the smells, the colors the feel of this time of year, and know that like everything, it will soon move on to the next time in the circle.

Peace, love, and Blessings....

Update !!!!

Now that other posts are made, its time to focus, clear, calm and "BE"....

Life is many lesson's all strung together.

It's how we handle the lesson, what we learn from them, and what the intention, and vibration is during and after that decides the next in the string.

We have choice's to make when we are presented with anything in life, the choice we do choose, either by actively choosing it, (meeting it head on) or passively (not doing anything) will define us and what we represent, in each thread of the string, and lesson.

I come from a spot in life, where I must, be active in the choosing, and yet still let it be, with compassion, and trust, doing my part, but letting the Higher power, (God, Universe or what you put a name too it as), to also preform their part. There are times when I can not see this for the life of me, but in the end it is there. Somethings we ask for, either by voicing it, wanting it compassionately, or always focusing on something. (that others have, do etc, that we see, or hear.) It is far better to choose for oneself, than to hand of the power and let the choice be made for us.

Nothing that is easy in life, seems to help us grow, its the challenging times, the so called "Difficult" times where we loose ourselves and fail to see what we were luck to have, see, experience before this challenge, and that sometimes the result of the end of the string, might also be a reward in itself. This can take mere seconds, or a life time, and sometimes that depends on what, when and how we choose if we do at all.

Joy can be found simply.

I wake up in the morning, and although maybe I hurt more today, maybe the cat is meowing, maybe I know everything I had thought I could do for the next few days, is not going to happen because of the way I feel, I still say "THANK YOU !!!". Thank you for allowing me to have that choice, waking on my own, seeing the sun, rain, clouds out the windows, Thank you for letting me be here to experience the "Cats Meow", even Thank you for letting me feel.

A flower means more to me now than things that people pay hundreds for. The sun on my face, the private space for gardening, meditating, even just sharing a cup of coffee, while the cat warms my lap, is enough for me to know, that no matter how rough it gets, what things I must choose, what string will be strung, I can still be thankful, and feel some sort of happiness, even while living life I had not thought I would, and in pain like I am, restricted at times beyond frustration.

Peace, Choice's and Love....

Namaste

Letter for health care

This I sent out to people that I thought could make a difference. The President of the US, his Vice President, Senator Collins, and Snowe, as well as Congresswoman Pingree, Gov Baldacci, and media contacts. The only one that has responded up till this posting at all, was Congress Woman Pingree with a generic letter.

09.14.09 From: David L. Storer 379 Cumberland Ave #1 Portland, ME 04101 207.415.3188 NatureDudeME@yahoo.com To: All listed below, I will try to make my point, while keeping this as short as possible. I am writing because of the health reform that is being attempted, and think its time to share my story, as well as time for you, to support it. I am a Maine born and raised, Army Veteran, who lives now with Chronic Pain, Chronic Fatigue, Depression and other things relating from a surgery in Scottsdale, AZ, after my family practice Doctor (Dr. Lawrence Kramer), misdiagnosed me, and sent me home on bed rest, medicated me with something I was allergic to. A lot of this has been told to me, because I do not remember this time well. May 2000, I ended up in the ER at Scottsdale memorial hospital, in AZ where I lived at the time. My lips, fingers, toes were blue, I could hardly breath. I was quarantined, made stable, then they did the Radical Thoracotomy to my left lung, and Thoracic region, due to an Empyema/infection. Causing spine, nerve, and muscle damage. At first they thought it was HIV, then it was bacteria from my mouth, they continued to list many things. 3 months after my release, they said it was Valley Fever. I am still unsure to this day. I was sent home, I could not walk, toilet myself, feed myself, and was told I would be lucky to make it 6 months. I received no Occupational Therapy, no Physical Therapy, or other services. A friend of mine, lugged me out of the wheel chair at the hospital, drove me home, lugged me inside, and cared for me, until I could care for myself, giving up his own job, and life to do so. I was told by Dr. Kramer, that my insurance (Aetna) would not cover x-rays, so he could diagnose me, I was told by him also that my insurance did not cover the services (I felt I needed) because of the diagnosis. It was in those crucial days, weeks and months that might have made my life worth living, or at least, less painful. When I was up and around weeks later, and at work for 1-2 hours a day, he admitted that he "dropped the ball", that it was his fault, and he did not ask for these services, because it came out of his bottom line. He thought I was dieing, and would not be around to do anything. Not like it mattered, in AZ its very difficult to find someone to help, a lawyer to sue, not even the medical license place was any help. My friends boxed me up, and help me get home to Maine to Die. My job that transfered me, refused the transfer once I got to Maine, My Family refused me, I got a job, tried to work, I stayed with a friend that ended up kicking me out, because he could not tolerate me being in pain. I lived in a Tent for a month, then someone at work help me find an apartment, then 1 month later, the job, decided they could not tolerate me working there in this much pain. I isolate, am very private, can not even think what will happen this afternoon, everything is gone, except pain. I live on Social Security Disability, Medicare, Housing. No help from the VA. I "make too much" for medicaid, for anymore than a small amount of food stamps ($14.00), all of my dreams, wants, even needs are gone. I do not take somethings because I can not afford them, DHS has all these loop holes to go though to even try to cover anything, and still if I do what they say is needed it changes, or too much time has passed. I can have a personal care attendant, but there is no money to pay one. Any devices I need I have to buy. No dental care, no eye glass care, limited on appointments for anything, while watching people flock to Maine for services, I can not not receive, but they get with in minutes of arriving in Maine. I could go on, but I wont. I am asking that you all, support President Obama's Health Care Reform. As it is now, Insurance is for profit, not for the health of Americans. This reform is the closest thing to what we need, like what those in Government office get. I hang on, hope, wait, and it cost ME personally with every breath. PLEASE see what our current health care is costing Americans. Give someone like me a chance to have dreams again, breath, live, think, feel with less pain, and possibly be able to work again as well. PLEASE!!!!!! Thank you and Sincerely, David L. Storer cc President Barack Obama Vice President J. Biden US Sen: O. Snow US Sen: S. Collins US Rep: C. Pingree Gov: J. Baldacci Valley Fever Story: http://valleyfeversurvivor.com/vfsmb/viewtopic.php?t=116

Maine Marriage and the Church

This is a letter I sent to out to friends, Senators, Congress person, Media etc.... I sent it out Thursday the 24 September.

Hi there, A few of you will know me, a few will not, while others might wish to know more, some will think ill of me. To be honest, I do not care one way or the other. I was born in Maine, grew up in Maine, I served my country in the Army, for the state of Maine. I was raised drinking Maine water, eating Maine food, spending money in Maine, and although I am about as "Maine" as a person can get, I can not marry the person I love, and want to share the rest of my life with. Am I less of a person, that deserves less rights? I am about fed up with the political way, ALL of our life's are handled by people WE have put in office. Years ago, I was taught, that these people, were put there to represent US, not their personal beliefs, insecurities, or what they might get paid to do or say, but what WE the people want represented. The problem is, once in office, most people will keep them there, for fear of the unknown person they might end up with next election. Maine has a Governor, that knows that it is WRONG and illegal to NOT treat every person the same regardless of anything, has tried yet again to make things right. This country was formed on the separation of church and state, freedom, and with each person being treated equal. He put in place, after too many decades of individuals not being able to marry, a policy so they can do so now, as they should have been able to in the first place. This is not about Religion, Christianity, or the defamation of marriage, this is about rights for all, freedom for all, and compassion for all. The majority of Mainer's feel that two people that love each other will not make less of anyone else's Marriage regardless of gender. Mainer's also do not like it when people from away try to run our life's, or control what we think or feel. The unfortunate thing is that the "Church" or so called Christians, again want to become involved in the politics of this free country yet hold their status as tax exempt. They are bringing many people, much money, and many resources to our fine State of Maine, from places that not only have no idea what it is like to be a Mainer, but also are over looking people in their own states that are starving, can not afford food for their family's, never mind housing, transportation, or health care, while turning their backs on what religion stands for most, to HELP your fellow man, Judge not lest you be judged, etc. People of Maine, what is more important? Taking care of those of our own, or trying to control things that do not effect us in anyway? If we let "The Church" (Never mind the Church from away) run our government, and let them control this, what else is next? We have people in this country, that have all of a sudden started to act like a bunch of spoiled children. They did not get "THEIR" way last November elections; they stand up and heckle everything that is good for the many, instead of the few. When will they see that America was born on the belief that we are all free, and that while being free, it is not free to remain so. It cost money for roads, bussing children to school, teachers, and it cost money for caring for each other. They are used to many years of that money going into their pockets so they could have a few houses, many cars, much more luxuries, while many more people can not afford to die, never mind live. These same people, (those in the first of this paragraph) are the very ones that deny rights to others. There will always be someone that has to compromise, someone that might have to back down, and see if it really is as they think. The problem is, everyone forgets that part. This state of Maine, has many flaws, some of which I myself have a hard time with, but we all must choose our battles. I ask all of us to think what is the best compromise? To let live, and let be, spend the millions, and millions on people that can not afford to live and die, or to spend it denying basic rights that have been denied for too long. I will get off my box now, but PLEASE think about this. What if it was you that was denied basic rights? How would you feel? What would you do? Peace, David disclaimer. This is my opinion, as calm and nice as I can put it into words. I realize the terms like Church, can also apply to places that support marriage for all, and do not always support the negative that most so called "Christians" have decided to focus on disguised as being Christian. Not everything apply's to everyone. "The mighty oak tree was once a little nut that stood its ground." --Unknown -- "We could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors....but they all exist very nicely in the same box." --Unknown-- Yahoo Profile: http://profiles.yahoo.com/naturedudeme Valley Fever Story: http://valleyfeversurvivor.com/vfsmb/viewtopic.php?t=116 Spoons Website: http://www.musicalspoons.org/

1978 Beach-Craft Motor Home named Rosie

1978 Beach-Craft Motor Home named Rosie

Well the secret is out.

We were waiting until things smoothed over in other's lifes and we had a handle on

things before sharing the news, but it is out, due to my own making I think.

"Rosie" as we named her, from the fact that she kind of looks like Rosie on the

jetsons, was found on Craigslist, and although we went to see her, we were not planning

to buy her, but when we saw her, looked a detail, some other factors, and that I knocked

off near half the price, because it is fall, well needless to say, she ended up in the family.

Rosie is a 1978 Beach-Craft Motor home, 31 feet long, has a 6500 Onan Generator,

is built on a Dodge industrial truck frame, with a 440 engine, 727 Transmission.

The tires are near new, all 6 of them, and everything is tight.

She has a new refrigerator, with full freezer, two furnaces, water heater, full bathroom,

and kitchen, as well as sleeping for 6 comfortably. The layout is is with a huge dinette

in the rear, that makes into a king bed, then the kitchen on the right, with a counter

for two stools, up to the door, on the left, closet space, storage cabinets, fridge,

then the bathroom. Then on both sides are couches, one a click clack, one a conventional

camper pull out, then your up to the driving section. I replaced the seats with more comfy

one, the dash has no tears or anything, and it comes with a CB radio.

Rosie drives down the road close to like she did new. The inside is dated for the 70's,

but anyone would be hard pressed to find anything wrong, damaged etc. The outside

needs a good washing and possibly paint, which is easy. The roof will does not leak,

but we will reseal anyway as a precaution.

So if your driving around, and see Rosie either in South Portland, at Wal-Mart,

Sally's Beauty Supply, the commuter lots in Portland, or South Portland, say HI.

We could be parking her there, could be resting, enjoying the day,

Playing spoons, writing, working on things or who knows what.

She will be stored in Windham for the winter, unless I decide to head south.

Once it snows, she is off the road, no rust, so why start now.

Thats it for now....